Trusting The Great I AM

Yesterday at church, I taught the youth a lesson on the Name of God - I AM.  The lesson went well for the most part.  I try to never take credit when I teach a lesson that God should get the glory for.  We spoke about how Moses went to Pharaoh and told him to let God's people go, and how the Lord manifest Himself  and His wrath each time Moses had to go back.  Most of all we focused on how Moses was unsure that the people of Israel or the Pharaoh himself would believe him.  He asked the Lord at the burning bush, who should I say sent me?  He ask the Lord the same question about addressing  the nation of Israel.  Both time the Lord said to tell them - I Am Who I Am, has sent me.  Was the answer.

The pastor spoke about the same thing, and choir sang two songs calling God the Great I AM.

So why the sermon before the blog - just to lay a foundation.

As you all know, I have been unemployed for the past 3 years.  I went through my own "man/provider" issues during that time.  Not once did my wife make me feel like less of man while she worked and I kept house, took care of school issues, cook, pay bills, scouts, church, etc. etc. etc.

Through it all, I gained a peace that surpassed my own understanding.  Every day possible, I would send out 5+ resumes applying for jobs all over Charlotte.  One day, I woke up and realized that I am the person that is too old to apply for a job that a recent college grad could apply for, and get half the salary I was getting.  I sat in interviews where I never heard from the company again, after making follow up calls and emails.  Being unemployed has made me trust God like I've never trusted Him before.  

I served at church with a glad heart.  There were times that I deserved to have more recognition that I was getting - WRONG!!!   God gets the glory in all situations and circumstances.  I know it's not about me or how I feel about anything.  I contemplated not working in the youth for a hot second - and then one of the youth told me how much I helped change their life.  Talk about timing!!!!

While teaching this lesson, I taught myself  that God continued to say that I(HE) AM God and beside Me there will be no other.  That He would/has supplied my families needs for 3 years.  That He has kept my find from going into depression.  That He has made me more of a man than I thought I could ever be.  That He is the restorer of relationships.  That He has kept a roof over our heads, provided food, clothing and kept us in good health.  I also learned that He is not a man that He should lie.  He taught me that I need to trust Him before I can trust myself or anyone else.  He let  me know that I am not just qualified to teach - but I am called to do it.  

With all of that, I took a medical aide/assistant class, maintained a 99.75; did 5 weeks of clinicals, took and past my NC State Exams, applied for and got interview (the same day) a job working in Pediatrics.  I know Him to be a Keeper of my soul.  Just when I was ready to throw in the towel - He refreshed my thirsting mind/soul and gave me strength to push forward.  Being the only male in a room of woman, while learning how to care for both men and women was an interesting place to be.  I just prayed - Lord, give me what I need to learn, practice and implement what I need to know.  

So now what do I do?  I continue writing that long list of characteristics of who He is in my life.  I continue to give Him my life.  I ask Him to continue to be my provider.  I give him my entire self - mind, body and soul, knowing that in and of myself, I can do nothing without Him.  Through Him, I encourage others, while He encourages me through His Word and His people.

Trusting Him requires me to make things right with others.  I wrote my father a letter asking him to forgive if I have offended him in any way.  It wasn't until that moment - that I felt the yoke removed from my neck.  I no longer wear it because He shattered it into a million pieces.

I trust you Lord.  What if it hurts?  I'll trust you Lord.  What if it doesn't work the first time I try?  I'll trust  you Lord!!!