My wife and I have been dealing with renal cell carcinoma for the past few months. Our.children are doing their absolute best to keep life moving as normal. We've not interrupted their schedules, kept them from school activities, or changed our pattern at home.
Our girls are stepping to the plate when asked, and our son asks a lot of questions which we answer with honesty. As for me, I am just trying to hold it all together.
Recently my pastor (the anointed Loran Livingston) preached about being strong in the Lord. We were reminded in that sermon that we try to do things in our own strength, and we tell others to do the same. Never do we encourage them to be strong in the Lord. Why is that? Is telling someone to be strong, just the right thing to say? Is it because we don't know what else to say? It's not enough to tell someone to be strong if you aren't going to tell them to be strong in the Lord. I've been on the "just be strong" side before. Not until my pastor said to be strong in the Lord did I get the revelation.
I cried like a baby from the minute he said it, until well after the service was over. He and the Lord, took me to a place of brokenness that I've not visited in years. It was refreshing, cleansing, and it felt good to release some of the weight that I was carrying for no reason. I was literally down to my last few cents and less than an 1/8th of a tank of gas with no idea of how I was getting to work the next day. So, I figured if I am going to use up the gas - I may as well go to church, and leave the rest to God. The day prior, we had to go and pay a bill that was way overdue in the amount of $142 and some change or risk losing my car
During the service and me being the weeping prophet, Kim Green sat next to me. This woman does everything the Lord tells her to do, much like my big sis Phyllis. At the end of the service, she hugged me and told that God told her to give me everything she had in her purse. It was the exact amount of money that we had to pay the day prior, to the penny.
My wonder twin - Missy Howard (love her like she were my natural sister) ALWAYS has the perfect song for me to listen to when she knows I'm going through something. No distance, miles or time can destroy the love we have for her and her for us. She is in tune with what is going on with us, and is there if we need her.
Well, my wife and I went and had another test done last week. The results were that she has an anoxic brain injury. What is that? Part of her brain tissue is dead. What is the impact? Her speech may never return to normal, her thought pattern may never be the same and putting words together will remain a challenge. But GOD!!!!!
She cries a lot and thinks she is a burden to me. I assure and reassure her that I love her and that she is stuck with me for the rest of our lives. A real man hangs in there and does what he promised before the Lord and witnesses on the their wedding day. He doesn't punk our and run out. He has unconditional love for her. When she is weak, he remains strong and has his moments at a later time. If she needs to be bathed or fed, he rolls up his sleeves and does what needs to be done by her. Why? She is my wife, my best friend, the love of my life, the mother of my children, my helpmate, and my good and perfect gift.
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